Slip sliding away...

Have you ever seen Back to the Future?  The one with the hover board?  Well, I could really have done with one of them yesterday afternoon.

My best friend, who has an extremely important job (far more serious than flogging wheelie bins for a living) had asked me if I would have her Labradoodle, Ralph, for the afternoon.  Well of course I didn't mind.  He's an absolute joy, and is Reg's second best friend (behind Neville the Rottweiler).  Reg loves Ralph's caramel afro, and insists on hanging onto it while making some very worrying noises.  Anyway, I digress...

The plan was to get all three dogs in my Mini and drive them to a nearby wood.  We would then spend a good two hours in the woods before piling back in the car and heading home, where three pigs' ears waited for them. I would then have a cup of tea while they slept as befitting three knackered dogs.

Sounded good, didn't it.  

The trouble was that after an hour of climbing up the path through the woods, Reg and Ralph decided to disappear off the path to get up to some non-curricular dog walking activities, ie afro fur nibbling and whispering of sweet nothings.  When I finally caught up with them, I decided that putting them all on their leads for the return journey would be wise.  I could then enjoy the walk more, not worrying as to where the two lovebirds had gone off to.  With all three dogs on various leads, it was a bit of a stop-start journey back until we reached The Big Hill.... I don't think I need to describe this to you, as the clue is in the name, and staring down the hill at the muddy path, I knew that it was going to take me a third of the time to get down as it did to get up.

The next ten minutes were spent screaming at the dogs to 'Slow down!', interspersed with, 'Stop pulling for heaven's sake', and just general screaming.  The hover board would have been great as I could have just glided down gently instead of doing an impression of Jayne Torvill with the wrong boots on.  Never mind 'Bolero', it was more repetitive screaming of 'Bo**ocks!!'  as I slid down the mud at a rate of knots.  Gathering myself together at the bottom of the hill, I gave myself a quick once over to make sure that a) I hadn't lost any body parts on the way down, and b) I still had three dogs.

They were just looking at me as if to say, 'All you had to do was let us off the lead...'

Yeah right, I'd still be up in that bloody wood now looking for them...


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