Sunday, 22 May 2016

Take me to the river...

I know that I have touched on this subject before, but whilst having a cut and blow dry yesterday morning, courtesy of the lovely Simone, I wondered when the pivotal moment was when men invaded the last bastion of female privacy....

I think it all started going wrong when the stylists' names changed from Donna and Sharon to Julian and Clive.  Of course, in those days, these early male stylists were quite camp, not treading on any of our stiletto clad toes.  As time has gone on though, my salon has gone through the booted and suited smart chaps through to the slightly terrifying, heavily pierced, leather clad male stylists.  Of course, these macho types make the salons look manly, making it acceptable for our menfolk to frequent them.

Now we all know that the hair stylist has a question checklist, the answers to which go something like this if you are a woman:

'Is that water warm enough for you?'
'Yes, that's fine, thank you'.

'Is that pressure hard enough?' (Head massage time - my favourite)
'Yes, perfect, thank you'.

'Have you got anything planned tonight?'
'Yes.  We're off to a party/dinner/the theatre/friends for the evening '.  (Delete as appropriate)

Here's what I heard next to me at the basin yesterday morning...

'Is that water warm enough for you?'
'I asked you if the water was warm enough for you'
'Oh right.  Yeah, it's alright'

'Is that pressure hard enough?'
'What are you doing?'
'We massage your head while the conditioner works on your hair'.
'Well don't.  It makes me feel slightly uncomfortable'.

'Have you got anything planned tonight?'
'How about later this afternoon?'
'I'm going fishing...'

So you see, we ladies go to the salon to make us look great and feel special.  We enjoy the whole experience of expensive smelling shampoos, and miracle working 'product', knowing that after leaving, all we have to do is slap on the makeup, slip on a frock and hit the town.

Men just go for a haircut.

They then go and get their rods out and wellies on if Mr 'I'm Not Comfortable with a Pretty Young Girl Massaging My Almost Bald Head' is anything to go by.....
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