Wednesday, 13 April 2016

All fur coat and no knickers....

Words from a Bird.  Day 104

As I looked at the tumbleweeds sculling across my laundry floor (now the kids have gone, I've not set foot in there for three days) I realised that now was the time to do a job which I have been putting off for about a year or so.

It was time to tackle the chest of drawers which sits in my bedroom.  This is the one which houses my knickers, bras and anything leg or foot related (socks, tights etc).  One drawer for each category, to make getting dressed in the morning simple.  If I am honest with you, my inherited OCD demands that I lay out all my clothes the night before, but let's not dwell on that.

So armed with a carrier bag (ever the optimist) I started on the first drawer, the knickers one.  On closer inspection, it would appear that when I pull a pair of knickers out of here, I only ever take from the front, never venturing towards the murky depths at the back.  Here's what I found when I dug deep:

Two European plugs
A hotel sewing kit
A packet of Imodium
A USB lead

Having removed these items and gone through the multitude of knickers, once I had taken out the baggy, grey, knackered and frayed ones, it left me with one pair of passable drawers.  This is OK as I have already ordered some to supplement my new knicker deficiency which should arrive tomorrow.  If they don't, I shall have to raid the husband's drawer...

The bag was by now full, so muttering 'You're going to need a bigger bag' in my best Roy Scheider voice, I started on the second drawer.  This drawer is always very sparse.  Four bras of varying inelasticity and support lay there in all their glory - for some reason, probably because I am rather sparse myself in that department, bras never feature highly in my shopping requirements.  I have more vests than bras...need I say more.  Anyway, they all went in the bag (except the one which Reg took a liking to which I shall track down later).

The third drawer is where I keep everything else.  I like to say it's just for tights and socks, but it also concealed:
Two more European plugs (no wonder I can never find one)
Five detachable straps from various dresses which I have worn over the years (none matching)
Seven odd socks, three of which I don't even recognise as belonging to anyone in my family
Two Euros
A timer plug
Seventeen knee highs of four different colours (threw them all away as colour matching was driving me insane)

Once all the socks were balled into pairs, it was time to open the final drawer.  This contains everything that doesn't fit under one of the other drawer headings. It also had in it all the knickers I had discarded after losing a load of weight two years ago.  Obviously I had never thought I would keep the weight off, and had hoarded the knickers just in case they fitted me again one day.  I'm not saying these were large, but at one point I contemplated knotting the legs and using a pair as another bag as my one was full. 

So now my drawers are empty, in more ways than one actually...
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